I appreciate you – 12 important things you need to know

by Adeshpal

One of the most underappreciated terms is ‘I appreciate you’ – which seems like another version of ‘I like you,’ but it is not.

The world is a fantastic place for those willing to look for the beauties in this world. Everything depends on how you look at it. Some people say that actions speak louder than words. In many cases, words echo way further and longer than actions. 

Here is everything you need to know about this phrase- “I appreciate you”, and why people use it when they do:

1. What does ‘I appreciate you’ mean?

People who are in love, people who are family, people who appreciate other people all love to say the phrase “I love you”. They say it like it is second nature. However, the words ‘I appreciate you’ are not as popular, and can leave a mark on one’s conscious depending on the person who said the phrase. The word ‘appreciate’ means “to admire” or “to be grateful.” 

In simpler words, I appreciate you can literally translate to “I appreciate you for being with me,” or “I will always be grateful for you being by my side.” Romance aside, the phrase has a whole new meaning for families. For families, it can translate to appreciating being born and coming into their lives. It can also mean having gratitude for changing the lifestyle of families. 

2. What does it mean when he says, “I appreciate you”?

boyfriend appreciate you

Males are less likely to express their feelings than females. A study of over 3 million men in the United Kingdom with mental pressure found that only 37% of the men were able to express their feelings of feeling down. Another horrific statistic in United Kingdom between 1981 – 2014 shows that of all suicides in the UK in 1981, 62% were male. This statistic had risen to about 76% in 2014. That’s because of various factors. Some of these factors include:

  • Social pressure – men are always taught by their friends and family always to be strong and keep their feelings to themselves.
  • Stereotypes – there is a stereotype that men should never express their feelings for someone, as it can make them look less manly. 
  • Tropes – movies and entertainment mediums picture a trope that “cool, strong” men are the ones who keep their real feelings hidden and never give their feelings away. 
  • Male culture – men find it a stigma of being expressive about their feelings. Other men shun them if they try to express their feelings appropriately. 
  • No emotional support – there is a stereotype which is also a reality that women can find emotional partners much faster than males do. Because male friends are very unlikely to provide emotional support, men often have to keep their feelings to themselves.

3. The power behind his ‘I appreciate you’?

If a male person says ‘I appreciate you,’ it means much more than just these three words. It not only means that he appreciates you in his life but also means that he trusts you as emotional support. They are willing to throw away their heart’s barriers for you. This is the highest level of trust any man can put on another person. 

In many cases, an ‘I appreciate you’ will be dramatically more powerful than your average ‘I love you’ or ‘You are the best.’ 

4. What does it mean when she says, ‘I appreciate you’?

girlfriend appreciate you

Although women are more expressive than men, they are also more likely to be careful about what they say. Women are more likely to choose more precise words and research before choosing words they want to say. A rather unique study from the Gates Foundation found that the male researchers were more inclined to use words that could be used in multiple contexts. Female employees were very likely to choose narrow and more accurate to the context words. 

Why she says ‘I appreciate you’

If she says, ‘I appreciate you,’ there is more to it than just appreciating what they mean. Similarly, because females are more likely to overthink than men about cross-gender or even same-gender words, it can mean a lot of stuff. 

If she is a romantic interest and says ‘I appreciate you,’ it could very well translate to a less lethal version of ‘I love you,’ that she is not willing to lose you out of your life, but also does not mean that she is willing to commit to only you for the time being. If she is a friend, it means that she appreciates you for helping them in times of need and that she might rely on you in the future. 

5. What does it mean when the boyfriend says, ‘I appreciate you’?

boy appreciate you

According to a specific survey, boyfriends take an average of 88 days to say ‘I love you’ compared to women who take 134 days to say the same. 88 days roughly translate to 3 months. Waiting 3 months to say something must be a lot of burden for someone, but should also be equally impactful. Though boyfriends are very likely to be expressive of what they want to say to their partners, the opposite is also true. 

Why boyfriends rarely say ‘I appreciate you’

Boyfriends are still men, and we discussed earlier how the toxic male culture makes it difficult for men to express their true feelings. Boyfriends who say ‘I appreciate you’ still mean it with their heart, and the longer he takes to say this phrase, the stronger the meaning.

 Judging from personal experience, boyfriends who say this phrase in the first week of dating usually do it because they have had a crush on you for long and appreciate you becoming their girlfriend/boyfriend. Similarly, this could be a more natural way to say, “I love you” without coming in as too loud or too early. If the boyfriend says this after they have said “I love you,” they might be saying it just to spice up the conversation. 

Otherwise, if you feel like there is a hidden meaning behind their ‘I appreciate you,’ it could be that they are going through a bad time in their lives, and your presence is helping them live through it. 

6. What does it mean when a girlfriend says, ‘I appreciate you’?

girl appreciate you

Women are more likely to say words when they get into a relationship. Many women stop trying so hard to find the words to say to their partners because they are already intimate with them. However, in rare cases, girlfriends who try to keep themselves reserved both physically and emotionally are very likely to have a hidden meaning when saying the words ‘I appreciate you.’ 

What you should get from her ‘I appreciate you’

Because girlfriends are more likely to be more expressive after getting in a relationship with you, you might begin hearing ‘I appreciate you’ more often. She might start saying this from the first day of going out, or even in a few days. Not many girlfriends take a lot of time trying to say these words. 

Though usually there is no hidden meaning, and there is no need to take this phrase so seriously, especially if they say it casually, reserved girlfriends‘ words can be quite impactful. Similar to a boyfriend’s ‘I appreciate you,’ she might be trying to tell you that they are going through a dark phase of her life, and you are giving her the ray of light needed to get through this abyss. 

7. What does it mean when the husband says, ‘I appreciate you’?

Husbands are supposed to be partners for life. In recent years, because of a massive increase in the rate of divorce, the term ‘husband’ seems to have lost its meaning and dedication. 

Nonetheless, when a husband says, ‘I appreciate you,’ it means that they are proud to have you as a life partner. If they didn’t say this when you were engaged or going out, this ‘I appreciate you’ is even more impactful. It means that they are lucky to have married you and want you to be happy with them. This can also be a precursor to show that the husband is willing to sacrifice anything to keep you happy and safe. 

The toxic male culture haunts

Even after becoming a husband, a male is a male, and they are still haunted by the toxic male culture that they have grown up around. They will still be less likely to say what they have in their heads, but if they do, it means that they mean it much more than the actual meanings of the words. As we mentioned earlier, if the husband only says this after marriage, it means that they are now willing to invest anything & take any risks for you. 

8. What does it mean when the wife says, ‘I appreciate you’?

An arranged marriage can take quite a few years before the wife even emotionally opens up to the husband. However, in love marriage, when a wife says, ‘I appreciate you,’ it can mean a lot of things, depending on their personality. 

If the wife is free-willed

If the wife is a free-willed person who has always been quick to say what she meant, the chances are that someone recently told them good things about you. It can also mean that she appreciates you in their lives and is happy to be in a marriage with you. 

If the wife is shy

If the wife is shy and rarely says what she means, the words ‘I appreciate you’ have more impact than the words ‘I love you.’ It must have taken her quite a lot of courage and energy to say this phrase. This means that the wife wants to invest more of herself in you, and has happily accepted you to be the leading figure of her life. She wants to try depending on you more, but can’t find the courage to say that bluntly. 

9. What happens if I say ‘I appreciate you’ to someone?

Words carry strength, but only until you say it a certain number of times. They lose meaning the more you repeat the same words. This is a universal fact. You should always be considerate of when you should say what words to someone. 

10. When you should say ‘I appreciate you’

say i appreciate you

I appreciate you‘ are words with a lot of power, provided that you are using them at the right time. There are only certain times when you should say ‘I appreciate you‘ to someone. Here are some of those times:

  • When you are grateful to have them in your life.
  • When you don’t want them to leave.
  • When you want to thank them for their support, but can’t find the energy to exclaim a full paragraph.
  • When you want them to know that they are loved and cared for.
  • When you want to show how you value their friendship and loyalty. 
  • When you are gratuitous of their impact on your life.

11. What happens if I say ‘I appreciate you’?

If you have never said ‘I appreciate you’ to that person before, they are very likely to take these words seriously. This is an indicator for them that you are willing to invest more in your friendship. 

If you have said it multiple times, but only on specific occasions, they can take it as a hint that the current event is important to you, and that their presence is keeping you going. 

If you say ‘I appreciate you’ all the time, the word will have lost its meaning, and it won’t mean anything for the person. Of course, this also depends on the occasion. If you say this phrase all the time, people would start remembering you with your catchphrase, and whenever they say the same phrase, they will be reminded of you. 

12. Does I appreciate you mean I love you?

That would be a NO.

It does not necessarily need to be love with regards to appreciation. When you love something about somebody, it is your fundamental human intuition instructing you to tell them about it.

It is the way we, as people, develop. Whenever someone hears a couple of words of kindness, then they make this sudden burst of power to take in their journey.

Final Thoughts:

All of this research proves that appreciating someone does not need expensive gifts and big romantic gestures. Sometimes, words are more expensive than gifts. This is why you should try to be careful about what you say and to whom. 

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